Can't a girl take a shower?

Before I went upstairs, I checked to make sure things were out of Eva's reach, doors and cabinets closed, etc. I'm in the shower for two minutes - had managed to wash my hair and shave one leg - when I hear Sophia whimpering outside the door, "Mommy, Eva's in trouble." What could it be this time? I wonder as dozens of scenarios scroll through my mind.

I race downstairs in my robe, hair dripping, to find this:

And this:

She had pushed her chair over to the counter and taken a big bite out of each and every strawberry. Never mind that I had moved them to the back of the counter, with this very fear in mind. Never mind that I was looking forward to eating them later that day. Never mind that I can't even shower in peace. And never mind that she had already unrolled a roll of toilet paper and tried to clean the counter with my makeup remover earlier that morning. Never mind that it's not even 9:30am.